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Thread: Zen and the art of nonesense

  1. #16
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    Australia
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    9,278

    Default Re: Zen and the art of nonesense

    I'm Late, I'm Late
    for a very important date,
    No time to say hello, goodbye,
    I'm late, I'm late, I'm late
    and when I wave,
    I lose the time I save.

    My fuzzy ears and whiskers
    took me too much time to shave.
    I run and then I hop, hop, hop,
    I wish that I could fly.

    There's danger if I dare to stop
    and heres the reason why,
    (you see) I'm overdue.
    I'm in a rabbit stew,
    Cant even say goodbye, hello,
    I'm late, I'm late, I'm late.
    ................
    ..
    A rational army would run away.
    Montesquieu

  2. #17
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    Default Re: Zen and the art of nonesense

    Yesterday, upon the stair
    I saw a man who wasn’t there
    He wasn’t there again today
    I wish, I wish, he’d go away.
    ................
    ..
    A rational army would run away.
    Montesquieu

  3. #18
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    Australia
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    Default Re: Zen and the art of nonesense

    Quote Originally Posted by Librarian View Post
    I should not venture to suggest that there is any special significance in the climax of the story, where a promising diplomat turns out to be a sexual anomaly.
    A diplomat, promising or not, who turned out not to be a sexual anomaly would be an anomaly.

    And on that point I should recall the story of a British diplomat, possibly in Moscow but maybe somewhere else, early in the 20th century, who wrote to his friend Reginald in England about a member of perhaps the Turkish or some related legation. He wrote something along the lines of:

    "We have a new member of the Turkish staff. His name is Mustafa Kunt. Well, Reggie, we all feel like that from time to time ......"
    ..
    A rational army would run away.
    Montesquieu

  4. #19
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    Default Re: Zen and the art of nonesense

    As pompous as a pompous poet
    Writing pompous poetry
    To pompous you-s and pompous Me-s
    Reading pompous similes


    "Although God cannot alter the past, Historians can"


    Samuel Butler


  5. #20
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    Location
    Surrey
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    Default Re: Zen and the art of nonesense

    She whispered "will it hurt me?"
    "Of course not" answered he
    "It's a very simple process,
    You can rely on me."

    She said "I'm very frightened,
    I've not had this before.
    My friend has had it five times
    And said it can be sore."

    It was growing rather painful
    Tears formed in her eyes
    It was hurting quite a bit now
    It must have been a size.

    "Calm yourself" he whispered
    "His face filled with a grin
    "Try and open wider
    So I can get it in."

    "It's coming now" he whispered
    "I know" she cried in bliss
    Feeling it deep within her now
    She said "I am glad I'm having this."

    And with a final effort
    She gave a frightened shout
    He gripped it in anguish
    And quickly pulled it out.

    She lay back quite contended
    Sighed and gave a smile
    She said "I'm glad I came now
    You made it worth my while."

    Now if you read this carefully
    The dentist you will find
    Is not what you imagined
    It's just your dirty mind!!


    "Although God cannot alter the past, Historians can"


    Samuel Butler


  6. #21
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
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    Surrey
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    Default Re: Zen and the art of nonesense

    “Move closer to the wall, my son, and speak into the grille
    Confession is the saviour of the soul
    If there’s something on your conscience, if you’re feeling weak or ill
    Confess... and ye shall once again be whole!
    Ask the lord for his salvation, he is waiting for your call”
    “I’m afraid I’ve sinned too greatly” said the voice behind the wall.
    “Let’s see if I have got it straight - your wife... her name is Liza
    She’s inclined to wear her dresses rather short
    She was bending over looking for an ice cream in the freezer
    When you, behind her, had this lustful thought
    She had to lean way over, for she isn’t very tall...”
    “And I wanted chocolate brickle” said the voice behind the wall.

    “Now, I know you’re newly-married (since you made your vows before us)
    But married people often act up thus
    It sometimes spoils the pleasure if the sex is too decorous
    So I see no reason why to make a fuss
    Perhaps your wife objected... did she try to start a brawl?”
    “No... I think she rather liked it” said the voice behind the wall.

    “Then go, my son, I find no blame... your actions may be kinky
    Tell Liza to be careful with her dress
    Next time she looks for ice cream to wear something long and slinky
    Then her husband will have nothing to confess
    We will not throw you out of church... I find no sin at all...”
    “Well they threw us out of Woolworths!” said the voice behind the wall.


    "Although God cannot alter the past, Historians can"


    Samuel Butler


  7. #22
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    Oct 2006
    Location
    Senta, Serbia
    Posts
    847

    Default Re: Zen and the art of nonesense

    A diplomat, promising or not, who turned out not to be a sexual anomaly would be an anomaly.
    Absolutely agreed, my dear Mr. Rising Sun. You know…

    There was an diplomat of Khartoum,
    Who kept a pink sheep in his room.
    Said he, "They recall
    The ivy – clad wall
    Where I first kissed my wife in the gloom."


    BTW, honorable ladies and gentlemen: how about some hi-tech poetry?

    Ye masters of Packets! Ye poor silly loons!
    Sell your boats and get Blanchard to make you balloons;
    For our fair modern Witches, no longer aquatic,
    Will never more cross but in boats Aerostatic!
    Ire Fortiter Quo Nemo Ante Iit!

  8. #23
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Indiana
    Posts
    743

    Default Re: Zen and the art of nonesense

    How bout I share some of my poems I wrote for school, and don't make me the only one to share, please someone else share.

    One of my favorites I made:

    Firefight

    Bullets here, bullets there,
    Bullets are coming everywhere.
    On this street I shoot with might,
    Trying not to die in this firefight.
    Death all around on this street,
    Trying to stay on my feet.
    I think am going to get shot in the head,
    Saying to myself “Oh god, am I dead”.
    Even though I fight for freedom,
    I know am going to my god’s kingdom.
    I say to myself “I fight for thee”,
    But am actually thinking “let my soul be free”.
    Wait, that sound, the steady rumbling,
    Yes, thank you, reinforcements are coming.
    I laugh with glee and smile with delight,
    Thanking the lord that I lived through this firefight.


    I got two more where that came from, lol, sharing is fun.


    "A pint of sweat saves a gallon of blood."
    - General George S. Patton
    "War Isn't about Dying for your country, its about making the other basterd die for his." - Patton

  9. #24
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Location
    Dublin, Ireland
    Posts
    778

    Default Re: Zen and the art of nonesense

    "A pint of Plain is yer only man," sez The Brother. (Apologies to Brían ÓNualláin/Flann O'Brien). JR.

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